Have Cheap Luggage, Will Travel

Satisfaction

Once I did a Bible study with a bunch of older women about how to balance disappointment in life and your relationship with God. I remember telling them that I had no major disappointments and didn’t really connect with the study. They looked right at me with eyes heavy from years of unrealized expectations and told me to wait a while. They were right…

My mom got engaged this week. That means that everyone in my immediate family will have been married before me…everyone. I can already feel the all too familiar looks of pity from my family that I will have to endure at her wedding.

For a long time, I have wanted to be married and raise a few kids. So, why would God have allowed all of my family that privilege but not me? Also, why would God put a burning desire in me for something that He is barring the path to?

These questions produce two warring reactions in me – anger over my disappointment and a quiet understanding that God’s plan is better than mine. Fortunately, my relationship with God won’t let me jump off the cliff of frustration no matter how much I want to wallow in self-pity. However, it bothers me that I am even asking these questions in the first place because it makes me think about the true source of my satisfaction…

If I am unsatisfied, than what would make me fully satisfied? What about you? I’m sure that we could make a long list together – getting married, better job, even “spiritual” things like becoming a missionary. But what happens when those dreams turn into unrealized expectations?

In the past I have dealt with it by dumping my dirty little life for a shiny new one – moving to a new town, getting a new job, looking for a new relationship, even buying a new shirt…I was constantly searching for satisfaction but coming up empty. My problem in this never ending search is that I followed myself to the next place. We have more to do with our own un-satisfaction than we realize.

So, where then can real satisfaction be found? One of my favorite authors on this subject says it best, so I will default to him.

“We all make gods out of what we take the most pleasure in. Christian Hedonists want to make God their God by seeking after the greatest pleasure—pleasure in him.

We do not mean that our happiness is the highest good. We mean that pursuing the highest good will always result in our greatest happiness in the end,” – John Piper, Desiring God

I am always grateful to discover when my convictions and thoughts don’t line up because it provides a chance for re-alignment to what I know to be true despite my emotional state.

Read: Acts 20:24
Ask: Sometimes looking at the expanse of the course put in front of you can eliminate tunnel vision to the uncomfortable circumstances of today. What do you believe is the course that the Lord has set out for you?

Read: Isaiah 45:19
Ask: If you are unsure of your course, what do you think this verse says about that? Are you really listening and seeking to find answers?